I WAS VIOLATED

Okay, so I may not have been physically violated, but my eye site sure was.

Hexagon, the hog barn where I work, is a bio hazard safe environment and all employees are required to shower upon entering the barn. It's not mandatory to shower out, but the general public appreciates it. Hexagon also employs a few older men who are pushing into their 70's.

See where this is going yet???

The last couple of weeks I have started arriving at Hexagon earlier than usual to help get some extra hours on my paycheck. On this particular day of arriving early at the barn, one of the older men was in the process of showering out to go check the newly purchased pigs in the quarantine barns located adjacent to the main barn. Just as I walked into to the barn to shower in for work, the man stepped out of his shower door in his tighty-whites to grab some Q-barn clothes in the cabinets across the hall from the shower doors because he forgot to grab some Q clothing when he came in. He let out a loud "WHOA!", and all I could say was "Jesus Paul!" and I turned around quickly and looked straight up at the ceiling so he could grab his clothes and get back in the shower. To make the situation worse, the barn manager happened to see it all through the pass-through cubby hole in the side of the wall that we use to push our lunches through to the other side of the barn. By lunch time, everyone knew what happened that morning.

After showering and punching in, I told the barn manager that Hexagon would pay for the life-long therapy I am going to have to receive after seeing that. He wiped away his tears and stopped laughing long enough to agree.

I swear I am going to wake up screaming until I die.

BUFFALO THEORY

I saw this posted on a friends Facebook page. I can still remember watching this very episode of Cheers where Cliff is talking to Norman about beer consumption. I totally ripped this off of my friends Facebook site to share with all of you. When I read this, it reminds me of my best friend and it makes me laugh.

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers!"

Amen, Cliff. Amen!

CHECK THIS OUT

Now that Labor Day has passed, I really should get outside and take down the tent that has been in my front yard for the last two weeks. I put it up for the girls to play in and I had the best intentions to take it down a few days after it was up. However, the girls left the door and windows to the tent wide open, and with all the rain we have recieved, it has turned into an indoor/outdoor swimming pool. I am a tad bit on the lazy side, so I was waiting for Mother Nature to dry out the tent for me. The thought of taking a bunch of towels outside to soak up all the water on the tent floor didn't fancy me. Alas, Mother Nature pulled a fast one on me. Since putting up the tent, we haven't gotten one day of moderately decent camping/tenting weather until yesterday. So, today I am going to trudge outside with some towels and do it myself. Thank you, Mother Nature, for the motivation against laziness.


I have a friend who started a blog very recently. I would like you to check it out. He writes about music, entertainment, and other things. It's titled On The Record With Ben and he is a reporter for the Jamestown Sun newspaper. I enjoy reading it and I hope you do too. I have made a permenant link for Ben's blog off to the right in case you want to go back to it sometime and cannot remember the address.