WHAT A WEEKEND
Dad and Darren got the toilet changed and working in no time. We got lucky and when we started up the water after the toilet was installed there wasn't any leaking anywhere. Yeah!! I have a working toilet!! Cassie has taken a new affection to the working toilet and she has used it often since they put it in. Cassie uses a step stool to get up on the toilet and she holds onto the seat and everything by herself without help and she even will wipe and flush the toilet too. I really think she sits on it so she can flush it.
What I was hoping would be a nice time out with my husband for nice drive and dinner for New Years didn't happen. Darren tried to put fog lights on his truck that he got for Christmas and they were not going on as he expected so he got mad at the whole world, threw the fog lights around, came inside and just sat on the couch. He went back to check the new toilet and said that it was a little wet around the base but wouldn't even call my dad to find out why it would be leaking so I called my dad and talked to him about it but it wasn't anything to worry about and there hasn't been any water on the floor since so I don't think there was a leak at all.
My mom had called me earlier in the day saying that she and dad were going to go to the Churchs Ferry bar and have New Years supper there and if Darren and I wanted to we could take Cassie to her place, give Cassie her bath, and then put her to bed at their place then when they got home, Darren and I could go out. I talked to Darren about it but he didn't say yes or no so I just carried on our normal evening routine and I already had Cassie in bed when my mom called and said they were home and asked if we were going out. I am so upset and disappointed over the whole thing cause I told Darren in the morning that I wanted to do something cause it was the last chance that I had and it would be months before I could get out again. He said he didn't want to do anything but I made it clear to him that I wanted to do something and we still never did. I don't even know why I bother at all. For a very long time now he's only been doing what he wants to do and doesn't give a rats butt if there is something I want to do or if it even means anything to me. I can tell him 100 times and it's like he doesn't even hear me. I am really starting to hate it, but what can you do about it.
I totally missed the whole New Years Moment too. My aunt from Oregon called and said that after she had tried calling two of my cousins and my sister and since she couldn't get a hold of any of them she decided to call me and see what I was up to. My aunt hardly ever calls and when she does, she goes on for hours and sometimes what she talks about isn't even relative to what the conversation is about and she gets side tracked and she will talk to her two daughters while she is on the phone with you and it just drives me crazy. She called me at 11 pm, which was 9 pm her time, and she stayed on the phone with me until 1 am our time. If she is going to call and talk to me for two hours, she could at least call me before 11 pm. I finally had to tell her that I had to get to bed because Cassie is always up by 8:30 am every morning. If I wouldn't have said that, I am pretty sure she would have kept me on the phone until 12 am her time.
This weekend Darren asked me if I had all the baby names picked out yet. I told him I was still waiting for him to agree on a girl name. He asked me what I had picked out. Over the last six months I must have given him over 20 names and he had said no to all of them. I told him what my favorite one was but he had said no to it a while ago. He said that he liked a certain name but I told him that I wasn't sure if I really liked it or not. I am thinking now that I just might go with what Darren picked because after I said that he just said "Fine. You just name the baby whatever you want". That kind of hurt because his opinion does really matter (especially in this situation) and I don't want to give the baby a name that one of us doesn't like. But I have gone through so many names I am really sick of it, I am basically hoping for a boy because that name we both agreed on and I almost hate the girl name.
Darren didn't help set up the bedroom for the crib or anything either while he was home like we were going to so now I have to move a queen bed, a night stand, and two dressers by myself and set up the crib somewhere it's going to be convenient and out of the way for Darren and with my luck he will hate how everything is set up when he gets home....oh well, I am not leaving all this stuff to be done the day before surgery and I will be damned if I have to do it when I come home from the hospital. Now that would just push everything over the edge. I still have to get town and buy a crib mattress, a car seat, and some personal items for the hospital but I may pick all those up when I go to my doctor appointment on Thursday. I may even run up to the hospital and pre-register too so that I won't have all that paperwork to do when we get there. I am going to have to ask my mom if I can borrow her Jeep cause the mattress won't fit in the car.
I started washing some baby clothes today. All I have left to wash are the receiving blankets and onsies and the clothes are ready. I can't believe the baby is almost here. I am starting to freak out over the whole thing. If I could sit on it and keep the baby in for another four months I would. I don't know how ready I really am for this....okay, I lied, I'm not ready for this at all but it's going to happen weather I want it to or not.
Sorry about all the raving, my weekend could have gone a whole lot better but it just seems I feel so much better when I let you guys know what's going on. I am sure everything is just pre-baby hormones and things aren't as bad as they seem and things will get better. I am telling myself that anyway to stay positive but some days are more difficult than others.
~12 DAYS~
What I was hoping would be a nice time out with my husband for nice drive and dinner for New Years didn't happen. Darren tried to put fog lights on his truck that he got for Christmas and they were not going on as he expected so he got mad at the whole world, threw the fog lights around, came inside and just sat on the couch. He went back to check the new toilet and said that it was a little wet around the base but wouldn't even call my dad to find out why it would be leaking so I called my dad and talked to him about it but it wasn't anything to worry about and there hasn't been any water on the floor since so I don't think there was a leak at all.
My mom had called me earlier in the day saying that she and dad were going to go to the Churchs Ferry bar and have New Years supper there and if Darren and I wanted to we could take Cassie to her place, give Cassie her bath, and then put her to bed at their place then when they got home, Darren and I could go out. I talked to Darren about it but he didn't say yes or no so I just carried on our normal evening routine and I already had Cassie in bed when my mom called and said they were home and asked if we were going out. I am so upset and disappointed over the whole thing cause I told Darren in the morning that I wanted to do something cause it was the last chance that I had and it would be months before I could get out again. He said he didn't want to do anything but I made it clear to him that I wanted to do something and we still never did. I don't even know why I bother at all. For a very long time now he's only been doing what he wants to do and doesn't give a rats butt if there is something I want to do or if it even means anything to me. I can tell him 100 times and it's like he doesn't even hear me. I am really starting to hate it, but what can you do about it.
I totally missed the whole New Years Moment too. My aunt from Oregon called and said that after she had tried calling two of my cousins and my sister and since she couldn't get a hold of any of them she decided to call me and see what I was up to. My aunt hardly ever calls and when she does, she goes on for hours and sometimes what she talks about isn't even relative to what the conversation is about and she gets side tracked and she will talk to her two daughters while she is on the phone with you and it just drives me crazy. She called me at 11 pm, which was 9 pm her time, and she stayed on the phone with me until 1 am our time. If she is going to call and talk to me for two hours, she could at least call me before 11 pm. I finally had to tell her that I had to get to bed because Cassie is always up by 8:30 am every morning. If I wouldn't have said that, I am pretty sure she would have kept me on the phone until 12 am her time.
This weekend Darren asked me if I had all the baby names picked out yet. I told him I was still waiting for him to agree on a girl name. He asked me what I had picked out. Over the last six months I must have given him over 20 names and he had said no to all of them. I told him what my favorite one was but he had said no to it a while ago. He said that he liked a certain name but I told him that I wasn't sure if I really liked it or not. I am thinking now that I just might go with what Darren picked because after I said that he just said "Fine. You just name the baby whatever you want". That kind of hurt because his opinion does really matter (especially in this situation) and I don't want to give the baby a name that one of us doesn't like. But I have gone through so many names I am really sick of it, I am basically hoping for a boy because that name we both agreed on and I almost hate the girl name.
Darren didn't help set up the bedroom for the crib or anything either while he was home like we were going to so now I have to move a queen bed, a night stand, and two dressers by myself and set up the crib somewhere it's going to be convenient and out of the way for Darren and with my luck he will hate how everything is set up when he gets home....oh well, I am not leaving all this stuff to be done the day before surgery and I will be damned if I have to do it when I come home from the hospital. Now that would just push everything over the edge. I still have to get town and buy a crib mattress, a car seat, and some personal items for the hospital but I may pick all those up when I go to my doctor appointment on Thursday. I may even run up to the hospital and pre-register too so that I won't have all that paperwork to do when we get there. I am going to have to ask my mom if I can borrow her Jeep cause the mattress won't fit in the car.
I started washing some baby clothes today. All I have left to wash are the receiving blankets and onsies and the clothes are ready. I can't believe the baby is almost here. I am starting to freak out over the whole thing. If I could sit on it and keep the baby in for another four months I would. I don't know how ready I really am for this....okay, I lied, I'm not ready for this at all but it's going to happen weather I want it to or not.
Sorry about all the raving, my weekend could have gone a whole lot better but it just seems I feel so much better when I let you guys know what's going on. I am sure everything is just pre-baby hormones and things aren't as bad as they seem and things will get better. I am telling myself that anyway to stay positive but some days are more difficult than others.
~12 DAYS~
posted by Janelle @ 10:29 PM
2 Comments:
At January 3, 2006 at 5:29 PM,
Josie, group organizer said…
Darren's probably just stressed out and not sure how to handle everything. Amadon was a lot like that too right before the baby was born and there was so much to do I was ready to kill him. And it seemed the more there was, the less he did. Whatever you do, do not just use Darren's name or vice versa because you will build resentment each time you have to say it and it will hurt your marriage. I think you should each pick 10 names you like and both look at the lists and see if you can even combine any to sound nice or see if you have a common thread anywhere. And don't do the giving them both names because if you each hate the other one you will just each call the kid what you want, Forrester-Case comes to mind as an example and it's a never ending battle. Or what if there's a name you like and a nickname from it that Darren likes or something along those lines. The name is a big thing though. I know it's frustrating and you just want to give in and then seethe later. I do the same thing but it doesn't help anything. Vent, vent, vent and then talk to Darren and tell him what you feel hurt about and angry about and be very specific as to what you want and see what he has to say. Let him tell his side too and maybe you guys can come up with some good compromises. And you don't need to wait months to every go out again. I will watch Cassidy and a newborn for you. I understand the whole breastfeeding bit too so I can even finger feed and cup feed. I mean that though. I know how hard it is to find a sitter for Adele and go out and especially if you breast feed how hard it is but you guys need to go out. Who knows maybe we can even swap a few hours here and there.Hang in there! As soon as you guys see your new baby you will be way better.
At January 3, 2006 at 5:31 PM,
Josie, group organizer said…
and I do mean the babysitting thing, i know how many people offer, "i'll babysit" and then never really do or schedules don't mesh up well but I'm open
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